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Monday Thoughts 1/28/2019

Monday Thoughts

“You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” ~~Marcus Aurelius

“The ability to simplify means to eliminate the unnecessary so that the necessary may speak.” ~~Hans Hofman

“It’s not only moving that creates new starting points. Sometimes all it takes is a subtle shift in perspective, and opening of the mind, an intentional pause and reset, or a new route to start to see new options and new possibilities.” ~~Kristin Armstrong

Statement #5
I am what I think.
I am a capable, competent, caring, compassionate woman.

Advertising is a big, big industry, and there’s a reason Superbowl commercials cost 5 million for thirty seconds; they get our attention. Reaching millions of people, ads for alcohol come with fancy horses or supposedly ‘interesting’ men. The ads urge us to find our beach, insinuating that glamour and fun can be ours if we only drink this or that. Today, women everywhere are tuning out ads and tuning into their own minds, making decisions based on need instead of snappy jingles or perceptions of lack.

Sobriety and Statement #5 in action encourage self-reflection. By focusing on where thoughts originate from; ‘is this a core belief’ or ‘am I being sold something” helps to differentiate empowering thoughts from slick advertising and slight of hand deceptions. Challenging our thoughts creates distance from impulse and can cement goals or intentions.

From our Program booklet, “Our day is programmed from the start by our thoughts. If we have a difficult morning and think that everything is going wrong, we can become unreceptive to positive thoughts.” This practice of awareness will enable the mind to not be hijacked by unhealthy thoughts, including disruptive advertising.

How do you mind your mind? Which tools are most effective?


Hi 4C Women,

I have had many positive experiences this week which have led me to reflect on how I think about myself deep down inside, not what I hope to project to the outside world. This has been quite challenging as I am in a place of uncertainty about my daughter. My heart is either breaking or wondering how I can help, using my life experience, which with families can be a challenge all on its own.

I encountered a woman at the grocery store who helped get a product off a high shelf for me. I am 5’1″ and she was just as tall . We had a lengthy conversation that was powerful, compassionate and openly sharing our situations. It was uplifting and I felt that we helped each other in meaningful ways.

The next experience was at a silver/gold buyer’s store. I was feeling quite sentimental about the sale and he shared a story that helped me accept my feelings rather than feeling silly. He said he learned a big lesson while at a buyer/seller convention. A young woman standing in line in front of him put a gold necklace with diamonds in it. The buyer picked it up, looked at it, slammed it down and said it was fake. Did she have anything else? She didn’t and as she turned around, he heard her say, “My mother gave that to me.” He learned at that very moment that there are memories behind most pieces of jewelry/heirlooms and it’s not easy to part with them so the need must be great to do so. He learned to be compassionate. He also said how blessed my daughter was to have me for her mom as his mom was a heroin addict and sadly never got help. Why he shared that I am not sure but it brought me back to Statement 5 and how WFS changed my life, the way I think about myself because I was fortunately willing to change. At church today, the pastor leaned back and said my name would be mentioned during service. I had no idea why. Each week a mission of program is lifted up for special recognition. As the staff member was making the announcements, she said that the program being lifted up this week is Women for Sobriety and there was our website logo big and bold on the screen. She then thanked me for my leadership and how grateful they were that this program was available for women in our community. As she later prayed for the congregation, she mentioned WFS again and to be sure to contact me if anyone needed help or knew someone who needed help. Got a sweet card from a WFS member back in NJ on how women in their 70’s approach happiness. The fact that she took the time to photocopy and send it to me with a handwritten note meant so much to me.

These experiences have helped me to believe that I am a 4C woman even at a low point in my life. I am grateful and hope that each of you will take the time to reflect on the changes you have made or are making to know your contribution to those you love, who love you and even strangers who sense you are a safe place/person to share. I hope that as you reflect on this Statement, that you will carry positive interactions/moments with you and remind yourself that no matter how difficult life may be at times, how we think about ourselves is crucial to our recovery. I also hope that each of us recognizes how blessed we are to have the foundation of the WFS Program to guide us, nurture us and keep us moving forward.

Bonded in being 4C women,

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