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Monday Thoughts 3/2/2020

“The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.”  ~~Audrey Hepburn

“To be deeply loved, means a willingness to cut yourself wide open, exposing your vulnerabilities…hopes, hurts, fears and flaws.  Hiding behind the highlight reel of who you are, is the real you and that person is just as worthy of love.  There is nothing more terrifying or fulfilling, than complete love, it’s worth the risk…reach for it.”  ~~Jaeda DeWalt

“What we have once enjoyed we can never lose.  All that we love deeply becomes a part of us.”  ~~Helen Keller

#10   All love given returns.

I am learning to know that I am loved.

In our WFS Program booklet there is a beautiful quote from our beloved Nancy Cross (fourcwoman) that states “All recovery roads lead to the ability to love and be loved.”  While it is true that in active addiction it can be difficult to comprehend or experience love but with the continued practice of Statement #10 love can flourish in our sober New Life.

Last week was a shocking and difficult week for our family.  We suddenly lost my sister’s husband and as I waited for my flight, I recalled and cherished precious moments together, from their wedding just a few years ago to our most recent phone calls.  Instead of trying to fix anything, I sat in stillness with my sister.  Amid our family’s grief, love connected us along with all of the lives he touched.

Allowing ourselves to feel our vulnerability can be a way to extend feeling loved.  When we are open, the real woman we are is open and our authenticity shines.  We show we are human beings in need of love and that we are capable of loving another.  Embracing rawness and vulnerability, a certain contentment arises, allowing a portal for love to expand.

Statement #10 Tool:

Brene Brown, a vulnerability researcher and author of The Power of Vulnerability, (as well as TED talks and numerous other titles) encourages being with someone who is in pain, whether it be ourselves or a loved one.  Be with someone in their darkness and not “race to turn on the light so we feel better.”  This includes ourselves.  Be with uncomfortable emotions and experience each moment.  If you have a Statement #10 tool that you would like to share, email [email protected]



Hi 4C Women,

Being vulnerable can be scary yet as Karen shared, it can open the way to authentically giving and feeling loved.  Another component of vulnerability is to accept ourselves where we are at this very moment.  Sometimes we put such restrictive boundaries on what we deem as lovable that we build a wall so high that when love is climbing up to meet us, we make it impossible for love to reach us.  Some people call it perfectionism.  We’ll be lovable enough if we always do the right thing, don’t ever make mistakes, let anybody down, say yes when we mean no, forgo our own happiness to please others – the list could go on and on.  Acceptance of who we are now does not mean we can’t embrace emotional and spiritual growth.  It means we accept there will be change and while that is the work to be done, we love ourselves along the journey.  All love given returns and perhaps it starts with loving ourselves and the gift we give to ourselves besides self-love is believing and knowing we are loved by others.

Bonded in knowing we can give love and are loved, Dee

WFS Annual Weekend Conference
June 12th – 14th, 2020
Hamline University
Saint Paul, MN
Pre-Conference Activities Begin June 11th

Registration Open Now!

2-night registration fees cover:
  • Friday & Saturday night lodging (except Day Pass)
  • 6 meals – Friday dinner through Sunday lunch at noon
  • 3 large group sessions
  • 4 breakout periods – choose from 16 amazing workshops
  • WFS meetings, icebreakers, informal activities, and workshops Thursday through Sunday

Read more about lodging options, agenda, workshops, and more on the 2020 Conference webpage!

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