Women for Sobriety

Monday Thoughts 5/20/2019

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Monday Thoughts

“You try something, it doesn’t work, and maybe people even criticize you. In a fixed mindset, you say, ‘I tried this, it’s over.’ In a growth mindset, you look for what you’ve learned.” ~~Carol S. Dweck

“If you are outgrowing who’ve you been, you are right on schedule. Keep evolving. ~~Lalah Delia

“Feeling at home with ourselves and being able to create a spirit of place that nourishes us physically, emotionally, spiritually is a goal worthy of our highest priority.” ~~Alexandra Stoddard

Statement #8
The fundamental object of life is emotional and spiritual growth.
Daily I put my life into a proper order, knowing which are the priorities

Our founder, Jean Kirkpatrick, Ph.D., understood that growth is critical to sustaining and enjoying sobriety and recovery. Without growth, life remains stagnant, unmoving. Statement #8 encourages growth in life; imagine a seed pushing through a shell to unfurl its stem and leaves. Without growth, the seed never feels the sun and simply withers.

It states in our WFS Program booklet, “Growth is an essential aspect of our recovery. It is the process of learning who we are and where to focus our efforts for personal change. Our morning meditation time, during which we read the Statements, gives us the opportunity to center ourselves and set priorities for the day.”

What actions can be taken to expand our growth? Here are a few examples that can lead towards emotional and spiritual growth:

  • Seek understanding: Even when nothing initially makes any sense, seeking and being open to understanding allows for personal growth and development.
  • Embrace independence: Instead of relying on what others think, say or do, owning thoughts, actions and purpose leads to greater depth, growth and feelings of contentment.
  • Check instant gratification at the door: Often a first impulse is to get over something ASAP. Moving through discomfort long enough to seek additional information or solution lays a foundation for emotional stability.
  • Invest in truth: Commit to stating, knowing and hearing the truth no matter how uncomfortable or stressful that truth may be, can lead to expanding strength and integrity.
  • Relationship: Connection is a key to growth; nothing grows in a vacuum. Seeing and participating in relationships to life outside of the self is connecting and an opportunity for growth and learning.

What actions have helped you practice Statement #8?

Hugzzz
Karen

Hi 4C Women,

Each of the example actions that Karen shared are great tools for change. After all, that is what WFS is all about and why I value the lessons each of the statements has given me over the years. Emotional and spiritual growth is a lifetime journey. There are situations I’ve experienced that let me know I have achieved the growth I was working towards and at other times, I realize there is more to learn. I am grateful that I can look at it that way rather than start in the negative self-talk of the past at how inadequate, ignorant or foolish I was in my decision-making. It was all or nothing thinking.

For me, spiritual growth is that quiet time I give to myself to breathe, to pause and take in the small wonders around me. It’s challenging at times to create that space and I have to say that it is one of the things I have to remind myself to do. I’ve been on my own for over 25 years and so I am use to being in charge of everything. That’s the reality. However, sometimes “everything” feels like a tornado sweeping me up and I’m wishing I could land safely in a place of peace and joy. When I start thinking like that, I know I have some work to do to create that place myself, especially since tornadoes do not gently place you anywhere!

I have this Life Balance Wheel on paper. Every once in a while, I look at it and do a self-check of how I spend my time.  It lists different areas of life with numbers to be circled that indicate your level of satisfaction – 7 being completely satisfied and 1 being completely dissatisfied. After you circle the numbers and connect them, the question asked is to imagine how your car would travel if the wheels were in this shape. In other words, do you give enough time to what matters in your life, what is in your heart, what gives you joy? This is all part of the spiritual journey. While there are certain obligations we all have to be responsible for, it is important to pay attention to the spiritual growth of our life journey. Do you have the balance in your emotional and spiritual growth that supports you as much as you deserve? If not, how can you begin to find and create that balance and satisfaction with how you spend your time?

Bonded in finding balance on our emotional and spiritual growth journey,
A 4C woman