“Be softer with you. You are a breathing thing, a memory to someone, a home to life.” ~~Nayyirah Waheed
“Today, let this be a reminder and a permission slip to love and nurture yourself, may your self-talk be kind, patient and forgiving. May your pace be gentle, your breath slow and full. The next time you look in the mirror and see this marvelous creature blinking back at you, allow love and acceptance to wash over you as a parent feels for a child, love for every quirk and freckle, for every atom and attribute.” ~~ Tamara Levitt
Stop looking outside for scraps of pleasure or fulfillment, for validation, security, or love—you have a treasure within that is infinitely greater than anything the world can offer.” ~~Eckhart Tolle
#7 Love can change the course of my world.
Caring is all-important.
What do you see when you look in the mirror? Who I saw towards the end of active addiction was broken, unworthy and felt beyond repair, yet there was still something else present: love. This small fraction within myself contained hope and the 13 WFS Acceptance Statements enabled love to grow from that hope.
Statement #7 in action changes the course of our world. Much like when a vehicle travels off track, love can apply the brakes and foster guidance. In our WFS Reflections for Growth booklet it states, “When we are free to love, and do love, all other emotions follow in complete and total purity. Our feelings are worthy of us. With love first, we are able to function perfectly. We are freed from negativities. Today I will put love first.”
When I look in the mirror today, I see worth, healing and growth. This week, let us put action into Statement #7 by taking the time to nurture, accept and be yourself. Schedule time for creating well-being and examine your self-talk every day. What can you do to engage and invest in yourself? Remember, you are a one of a kind, beautiful example of love in action!
Hi 4C Women,
Years ago, I turned to others, seeking approval and acceptance, believing that would lead to self-love and self-worth. I was so needy and dependent on others to define my worth, my being lovable. Learning to love myself changed my life completely. I didn’t think it was possible yet learning to turn negative self-talk into positive self-talk, to believe I was actually worthy of loving and being loved, that I had value and worth to give and be given, was a treasured gift that this Statement and the WFS program gave me. In this time of social isolation, it has become even more evident how caring for others and ourselves is vital to our self-esteem and well-being.
Here are a few ways to build our self-esteem:
1. Review your strengths and achievements. Celebrate your own special qualities. Make a list of qualities that you like about yourself, things you are good at such as having a sense of humor, being a thoughtful person, having patience, creative, good listener, etc. If you are having a hard time with your list, ask some close friends. You may be surprised with what they come up with. When you are having a bad day and feeling down, bring out this list and reaffirm yourself.
2. Stop comparing yourself to others. If you are focusing on people you think are “better” than you, it will only set you up for more negative thoughts and even lower self-esteem. No one is perfect. On the other hand, by noting the characteristics or behaviors of people you admire, you can try to develop those same characteristics in yourself.
3. Don’t be a doormat: Learn how to say NO. You don’t have to say yes to everything people ask of you. Start to develop boundaries and accept that it is perfectly OK to say no. If you don’t acknowledge your needs and desires, no one else will. It leaves the door open for people to take advantage of you. If you can learn to say no sometimes, you are telling yourself you have value. (Remember that “no” is a complete sentence that doesn’t require an explanation. Also, saying you want to think about a request gives you time to decide whether or not this is something you want or feel you can and have the time to do.)
4. Learn how to accept compliments. It’s great to receive compliments. Accept them graciously. Just say thank you and smile. If you dismiss compliments or ignore them, you are giving the message that you are not worthy of them. In the future people may be less likely to compliment you if they think you are just going to brush them off.
5. Associate with positive people. Being around people who are positive and supportive will help you feel better about yourself. If you surround yourself with negative people, they may influence your own attitude or put you or your ideas down. Find time for your friends. Stay in touch, whether by phone or e-mail. Having a network of positive, supportive friends can be a great source of support.
This list is a few years old and I’m not even sure who the author is yet I feel they are great guides and wanted to share them with you.
Bonded in learning to love ourselves and knowing that caring is all important, Dee
June 12-14, 2020
New Addition – Open Houses!
- Sunday, June 7th, 1-3 pm
- Tuesday, June 9th, 9:30-11:30 am
- Thursday, June 11th, 6-8 pm
Test your tech and make new connections during three drop-in Open Houses during the week prior to the official conference event. Practice logging in to a Zoom meeting and learn tips & tricks from our Geek Gal Squad, which will be on-call all weekend.