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New Meeting – Chicago, IL (Fridays)

WFS is proud to announce the start of a new face-to-face meeting!

Chicago, IL

Fridays 9:00 am

Please email [email protected] with questions and to obtain the exact location/details of the meeting.

Please join us in extending our gratitude to the volunteer Certified Facilitator who has made the commitment to bring the New Life Program to her local community!

If you are feeling inspired to bring WFS to your local community, please review the requirements for becoming a Certified Facilitator and contact [email protected] for assistance.

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New Meeting – Chicago, IL (Thursdays)

WFS is proud to announce the start of a new face-to-face meeting!

Chicago, IL

Thursdays 6:30 pm

Start Date: 10/14/2021

Please email [email protected] with questions and to obtain the exact location/details of the meeting.

Please join us in extending our gratitude to the volunteer Certified Facilitator who has made the commitment to bring the New Life Program to her local community!

If you are feeling inspired to bring WFS to your local community, please review the requirements for becoming a Certified Facilitator and contact [email protected] for assistance.

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Monday Thoughts 10/11/2021

“Live your life, sing your song.  Not full of expectations.  Not for the ovations.  But for the joy of it.”  ~~Rasheed Ogunlaru

“You are your own worst enemy.  If you can learn to stop expecting impossible perfection, in yourself and others, you may find the happiness that has always eluded you.’  ~~Lisa Kleypas

“Being in control of your life and having realistic expectations about your day-to-day challenges are the keys to stress management, which is perhaps the most important ingredient to living a happy, healthy and rewarding life.”  ~~Marilu Henner


#3 Happiness is a habit I am developing.

Happiness is created, not waited for.

It was not until sobriety and recovery that I became aware of how expectations altered life experiences.  As a child, they created a sense of routine and security. Yet growing into adulthood, many expectations felt overwhelming and created a deepening wedge of shame and guilt.  Alcohol had become an escape route but the WFS New Life Program provides healthy direction and empowering tools.

Statement #3 encourages development. Happiness is a habit I am developing.”  It allows us to be where we are and work towards increasing feelings of happiness or contentment.  When expectations are lowered, whether in ourselves or others it can increase feelings of balance and stability.  This can increase insight towards further development thereby creating a healthy cycle of growth.

In our WFS Reflections for Growth booklet, our founder Jean Kirkpatrick, PhD wrote “Happiness is a state of mind first.  Then it becomes a state of being.”  This week, examine your thoughts and identify where you are actively developing a foundation for happiness.  Release what no longer serves you or brings balance or joy.  Adjust your beliefs, assumptions and/or expectations to meet your goals and aspirations.  How can you increase your feelings of happiness?

Hugzzz

Karen


Hi 4C Women,

Happiness contentment, joy, appreciation are all positive words leading us to developing awareness of what creates those feelings.  I have this great book, “Field Guide to Happiness” by Barbara Ann Kipfer.   Her book is full of ideas, questions, and activities that I have used in the past to uncover what is my happy path in creating moments to treasure.  I am a list maker so some of the activities spoke my language.  Her philosophy about lists is keeping track of wishes and things one is happy or grateful for and discussing the importance of the little things in life, the details.  Lists can be soothing, funny, a balm to the cluttered, ever-moving mind.  Lists make us think and sharpen our minds

The first question helped me to take a look at my environment which I had never considered.  I was asked to list things I am happy about in my home environment.  Examples: favorite books in the bookcase, comforting sounds of a wind chime, clear view of seasonally changing nature, caller id, even garbage pick-up day.  For me, it’s decorating my artificial tree for each season.  As I unwrap each treasure, I feel myself smiling and grateful for the memories these items evoke and awareness of the changing of the seasons.  I also love hearing the birds chirp in my backyard or sitting on the porch chatting with my neighbor.  It reminds me of growing up, living in a row house, and sitting on the porch conversing with neighbors next to me or waving hello to the neighbors across the street.

Then she asked for a list of things you were happy about yesterday!  Wow, this year has made that list challenging but doable.  Example: Making it through the green light, rerun of your favorite show, the luxury of a shower.

It’s a big book so I will share just a few more questions to guide you in creating your awareness.

Happiest Moments/Situations List.  This list is to acknowledge we survived tough times but also that we have experienced good times.  A reminder of appreciating those moments, remembering the positive, joyful feelings we experienced and how we are continuing to develop and create awareness of happiness that has special meaning to us.

Make a list of what you value most – your quality core values and elaborate on what you can do to strengthen them in your life.  Think about how you spend your time.  Is it in correlation with your core values?

Make a list of what makes you happy in your life roles.  I am a single woman, mother, friend, volunteer and making a list of how each role makes me happy was quite eye-opening.  Because WFS is not a program of judgment, it was refreshing to be totally honest with each role and see how I can increase the happiness factor or lessen the less positive factors.

Make a list of all your achievements – big and small.  We need to be our own cheerleader.  Looking at the list of achievements, can you feel the happiness that acknowledging these moments brings to your life?

Before you go to bed, make a list of 10 things that made you feel happy during the day.  That will be very helpful in answering the question about what made you happy yesterday!

Make a list of things you can do to add beauty to your life that cost little or no money.  Sitting on my porch costs nothing yet it brings back happy memories while I am creating new ones.

And finally, with all this awareness and creation of happy moments, think of ways to share joy with others.

Bonded in creating awareness, moments of joy, appreciation for what we have and sharing it with others, Dee


Shop on Amazon?

Shop through smile.amazon.com instead and a portion of your purchases will go to WFS – at no cost to you. Designate WFS as your charity today!

https://smile.amazon.com/ch/23-1972763

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Monday Thoughts 10/4/2021

“You are not your feelings. You just experience them. Anger, sadness, hate, depression, fear. This is the rain you walk in. But you don’t become the rain. You know the rain will pass. You walk on. And you remember the soft glow of the sun that will come again.” ~~Matt Haig

“I gave myself permission to feel and experience all of my emotions. In order to do that, I had to stop being afraid to feel. In order to do that, I taught myself to believe that no matter what I felt or what happened when I felt it, I would be okay.” ~~Iyanla Vanzant

“Feelings or emotions are the universal language and are to be honored. They are the authentic expression of who you are at your deepest place.” ~~Judith Wright


#2 Negative thoughts destroy only myself.

My first conscious sober act is to reduce negativity in my life.


A rollercoaster of thoughts and emotions has washed through me the last few weeks; we said goodbye to our cuddly, chocolate chihuahua, Tigger. Yet it is because of sobriety and recovery, and practicing the WFS Statements that I am able to accept, understand and process what I am feeling, no matter how uncomfortable or scary the emotion.

Before my New Life, grief frightened me. Somehow, I thought if grief got close to me it would swallow me up. I worked hard at keeping it at bay or not feeling it, whether it be shoving it down deep inside or trying to smother it with alcohol. Of course, grief worked its way to the surface no matter how much I drank or tried to hide it. The WFS New Life Program and especially Statement #2 create a portal for processing difficult thoughts and emotions.

My relationship with Tigger felt different because I respond differently. Living in sobriety when he arrived in our home felt special. This dog would know the real me. I felt grateful and cherished this four legger with new perspective, so when he was diagnosed with cancer late last year, we made the best of it. Saying goodbye is never easy but living the Statements has helped me walk into these difficult emotions and begin to move through them. Giving myself permission to experience the depth of my emotions by sharing feelings, journaling and listening to guided grief meditation is a form of self-care and an empowering way to reduce negativity. The emotional pain may still be present, but today I stand in sobriety and strength.

Hugzzz

Karen


Hi 4C Women,

Trust = ourselves, our intuition, our feelings that signal when we need healing, support and self-care. I have learned a lot about myself through Statement #2. I realized that my thoughts were constantly negative which projected into my conversations and self-talk. I really wasn’t aware of it until I started practicing this Statement. It took a lot of pausing before spewing my negativity. I eventually created a balance because I didn’t want to deny my feelings of frustration, anger, disappointment, etc. That denial is how I justified my drinking rather than learning how to express myself in a calm, clear manner. If I experienced typical feelings of being unheard/ignored, rather than become completely negative or drinking the thoughts away, I worked on a plan for change. My words became my empowerment. I had a choice to express myself confidently, not in anger, but in my truth. It took a while to feel comfortable doing that and every now and then, it can still be quite challenging.

The important lesson is that I am willing to continue learning and practicing. Negative thoughts, especially about who I am as a person, can cause such pain and I knew I had to stop believing old messages that no longer served me. The moment my self-talk becomes self-demeaning, I stop and ask myself, is this who I am right now, this moment, or is it a false description from someone else in my long ago past? It’s a lot to overcome yet I rather work on that then be stuck with unproductive messages that stop my positive, self-affirming progress in its path. Nancy Cross once sent a message that said, “Don’t make your thoughts your prison.” Wow! I had the keys to unlock the prison I was holding onto with my negative thoughts. I still use that phrase when I catch myself in that once in a while moment.

In the end, it’s about setting boundaries with your thoughts and your relationships. Whether it’s yourself repeating negative definitions of who you are (false definitions) or relationships that keep you stuck in negative thinking by putting you down, keeping the past in the present, remember you have the keys to unlock those thoughts, the tools and courage to make the necessary boundary changes.

Something to think about. Changing your life starts with changing your mind. Who you think you are is who you will become. True transformation begins when you understand that you alone are in charge of your reactions-even in the most difficult circumstances (Author Judy Lief)

1. Your own thoughts can trap and undermine your potential for growth. What unhealthy thought patterns would you like to examine and unravel?

2. When you focus your thoughts, they have more power. What one thought would you like to hold in your mind this month?

Bonded in courage, truth, growth, boundary setting and the keys to unlock it all, Dee


Conference Planning Watch Party!

Grab your popcorn & join us for a night of fun as we gear up for the 2022 Conferences.  Do you remember how magical Conference 2021 was?  Wouldn’t you like to be part of the behind the scenes effort?  Join us to learn all about Conferences 2022 & get involved!!

Saturday, October 9, 7pm EDT

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/89424437953?pwd=N3Y4OHZpblp1OFYzNGFOc25kT0NvQT09

Meeting ID: 894 2443 7953

Passcode: 529849