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Monday Thoughts 9.11.23
“We must reject not only the stereotypes that others hold of us, but also the stereotypes that we hold of ourselves.”
Shirley Chisholm
“Don’t think about making women fit the world—think about making the world fit women.”
Gloria Steinem
“Once I learned to like me more than others did, then I didn’t have to worry about being the funniest or the most popular or the prettiest. I was the best me and I only ever tried to be that.”
Issa Rae
#12 I am a competent woman, and I have much to give life.
This is what I am, and I shall know it always.
For years I believed the thoughts rolling through my mind; you don’t measure up, you don’t fit in, and why bother? you’ll fail. These thoughts had become so automatic and normalized before my New Life that it felt challenging to change them. Yet over time, this line of thinking had taken away the ability to feel competent at anything but sobriety, and Statement #12 in action changes that.
One of the most helpful tools to change this outdated perception is affirmations or self-imaging. In her article on Self-Esteem, our founder, Jean Kirkpatrick, PhD states “Begin today to grab hold of your thoughts and, consequently, your life. Begin positive self-imaging. Never underestimate the power of the messages you can give yourself. Our mind is a flip chart waiting to be written on. And the messages we write are those that will form us, and create the new woman we are becoming. In our “New Life” Program we have a good sentence to begin with: I AM A CARING, CAPABLE, COMPETENT, COMPASSIONATE WOMAN.” This became a healthy new mantra.
At first, it felt funny to say this out loud or even internally but it was like starting out down a path that led to where I wanted to go. Jotting down positive notes began to reinforce this new mantra, and Statement #12 in action began to morph outdated thinking into new healthy patterns. These patterns built a strong foundation that can withstand the flashes of past negative thoughts. Today I embrace that I am a competent woman.
Hugzzz
Karen
Dear 4C Women,
I love the image of a flip chart and being in charge of what I write on it. When I think back to the beginning of my recovery journey, I can visualize the negative words I thought and wrote about myself. It was brutal and certainly not what I write about myself today. While this Statement can initially be quite intimidating and almost uncomfortable to say out loud, it is the truth we need to believe about ourselves. Growing up, I was taught that saying anything so positive would be conceived as conceited or bragging – a big no-no for girls! So, perhaps if that is your history, this Statement is the path to authentically and proudly acknowledge the positive gifts, talents, and skills you possess.
Whenever I share WFS with others, I want them to know this is a positive approach to recovery with the goal of self-love, self-worth, and self-esteem. I’ve been privileged to be a part of women creating their New Life and acknowledging that they do, indeed, have much to give life. I believe this Statement plays a major part in how we define ourselves.
I came across questions I have asked in the past and I want to share them again. It always fascinates me as I date my answers and is fun to see if there are some differences or if some remain the same. I think a lot depends on what is going on in my life at the moment which is why I make sure my answers are dated.
What do you feel you have to give to life?
Where does your competency show in this world?
I am worthwhile because…
I deserve…
I practice Statement #12 by doing…
What is your mantra as it relates to Statement #12?
List 5 things you admire about yourself… (Be bold in answering this) …
Date: ____________________
Bonded in believing and living your worth and value, Dee
We are pleased to announce an updated version of the Program Booklet! The Materials Team worked diligently to remove any pesky errors, provide all of WFS’s foundational information in the front, and redesign the cover while keeping the life-changing content written by Jean!
Stay tuned because we will soon be offering the Program Booklet digitally and rolling out an updated Beginner’s Collection.
