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Conference Planning Kickoff

Have some great ideas for next year’s conference events? We will be kicking off the planning process for both our usual in-person Annual Weekend Conference *and* a fall Virtual Conference in 2022, so we will need more help, ideas, and organization than ever before! Please be a part of this exciting process that provides hope and support to hundreds of women around the globe.

Conference Planning Kickoff
Join in on the fun!
Sept. 11, 2021
12 pm US/Eastern
Passcode 109561

Check for your Time Zone at

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New Platform for WFS Online

Women for Sobriety, Inc., is excited to announce that our WFS Online community will be moving to a new, more user-friendly and feature-rich platform in the coming months.

Many of you know that WFS Online was migrated from a forum-based platform to a mixed platform (forum and feed) about two years ago. Since then, we have learned so much about the needs of our online community and identified many opportunities for improvement.

We know what an important lifeline the WFS Online community is to so many women, so we have been hard at work identifying and vetting a more sustainable and intuitive option. We are thrilled to report that we have found a fully-managed solution that we believe will meet our needs now and far into the future!

Some exciting things about the new platform include:

  • Easier navigation & search functionality – find what you want, when you need it
  • More content on the Home Page that will improve the experience for new and existing users
  • Improved activity feed capabilities
  • More functional calendaring system for our many online meetings
  • Better Group functionality – both for our ongoing Connections groups and for coordinating the activities of our many volunteer groups
  • Interactive video library
  • And more

One of the best things about the new platform is that it is fully managed by the vendor, meaning that WFS staff and volunteers will need to spend less time on worrying about the technical stuff and more time on what’s truly important – building community and supporting women as they overcome addiction!

Please keep an eye out for more information as it becomes available. If you are interested in being involved in the configuration and testing of the new platform, please email [email protected] to volunteer.

Adrienne and the WFS Website Team

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Women for Sobriety Strategic Plan

Release the past – plan for tomorrow – live for today!

The WFS Board of Directors is happy to release our new Strategic Plan, including our new, modernized Vision, Mission, and Values statements. We hope that you will join us as we continue to develop the New Life Program and reach even more women in the future!




WFS envisions a world where individuals live mindful lives and take responsibility for their thoughts and actions Through the New Life Program, WFS supports women seeking a sober life in recovery from problematic substance use


Compassion: WFS promotes empathy and caring for self and others.

Connection: WFS creates safe spaces where women support the expression of thoughts, feelings, and needs.

Empowerment: WFS encourages and celebrates women and their right to be their own unique individuals.

Love: WFS commits to authentic relationships defined by mutual value and worth.

Respect: WFS acts with integrity, honoring every woman’s experiences and ideas.


What about the old Mission Statement?

Let us know what we should do with the 2011 version of the Mission Statement by taking this brief survey.

Image of a phoenix rising with the words "I'm Possible!


Learn more about the strategic planning process and how we are putting it into practice at the Celebrate the Possibilities event on Saturday night at the WFS Virtual Conference 2021!

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Remembering A WFS Sister – Pat St G

On April 20, 2021 after a short illness at age 90, Patricia St. Germain from RI left this earth for her heavenly home. Pat was a long time member, joining WFS in 1987. After two years of sobriety in 1989 she became a certified facilitator.  In 1992 she joined the Board of Directors. In 2011 she resigned from the board and in 2017 resigned as certified facilitator. She served 19 years on the board and led her group for 28 years. Pat attended many conferences, was an active contributor to Sobering Thoughts and organized many fundraisers for WFS. She dedicated over 30 years to the WFS organization helping women in recovery. We lost a beautiful 4C woman.

Several 4C Sisters share their memories of Pat and her service to WFS:

I met Pat in 1990 at the WFS Conference in PA.  She was so welcoming, had a great sense of humor and was a huge supporter of WFS.  She and I joined the WFS Board the same year in 1992. She retired from the Board in 2011 and it was quite a loss.  She had a lot of creative ideas and was always willing to help in so many ways.  I loved seeing her at the conference.  One year in the fall, a group of us took a weekend trip to Rhode Island.  What a blast.  We laughed, shared encouraging words and felt pure enthusiasm in being together.

I have so many fond memories of her kindness and thoughtfulness.  When I moved to AL, she decided each year that she attended conference to give me $20 gas
money.  She was so sweet in the way she wanted to help me without my ever asking.  It was just her own special way of giving back.  I loved her humor.  One year at the WFS Conference she was part of a group who decided to do a unique type of auction, all dressed in costumes and masks.  It was hilarious and raised a decent amount of money for WFS.

So much kindness, caring and love shown through Pat in her actions, her words.  I will always be grateful for her devotion to WFS and how much of a difference she made in my life and so very many others.  She was indeed that one in a million woman who brought joy and especially hope to the lives she touched.  I will miss her deeply.

I met Pat at the WFS conference in 1996. From that first moment we bonded. I would have the honor of sharing many conferences with her. What I remember the most and will carry with me is her love, encouragement, support and humor. She was one of the women I really looked forward to seeing every year. I enjoyed our time attending Saturday afternoon mass together. That became a tradition for us at conference.

One of my fond memories of Pat is when one year a group of 4C women went to dinner before opening ceremony and Pat’s humor was in full swing. She acted like she couldn’t read the menu and had one of the women actually read the menu to her. We all were laughing so hard I feared we would be kicked out of the restaurant. At the end of that weekend when Pat and I were saying “see you next time” (as we never said good bye) she made the comment to me, “Who would have thought we could have so much fun sober?”
Lisa L (lilbear)
Cinti, OH

Pat I am going to miss you so much. What you taught me, shared with me on the recovery journey has left an impression on me. Though I am sad and hurting I too have the belief that you are now resting comfortably in Heaven. Until we met again sister, We are Capable, Competent, Caring and Compassionate. Always willing to help another. Bonded together in overcoming our addiction.

My first memory of Pat St. Germain was at my first conference.  I had gone by myself; no one from the group I was attending was able to go.  Pat came up to me and introduced herself to me and welcomed me with open arms. From that moment on I felt so comfortable and not alone. Pat was so friendly and the word grace is what I think, when I think of her. I shall miss her as will so many other women.

P.S. Yes Pat sobriety is fun.

A giant in the WFS community has passed and Heaven is one Angel richer. I was both shocked and saddened to hear that Pat St. Germain has passed away. Pat was a woman who couldn’t be defined by just calling her a “daughter”, a “mother” or a “woman in recovery”. Pat transcended all of those monikers and none of them scratched the surface of who Pat was and how valuable she was to WFS. When I think of Pat, my immediate image is of her smiling face. What a smile that lady had. I consider myself both blessed and lucky to have served with her on the WFS Board of Directors. It was there that I was able to witness first hand her passion for WFS. Pat loved WFS and wanted each and every woman to experience the joys of recovery.

Every June, at the annual WFS gathering in Quakertown, I looked forward to the meeting of the Board of Directors. It was Pat’s smile that was a constant. Her energy and love for each and every one there in Quakertown was infectious. She was the role model for doing whatever was necessary to benefit WFS. While I didn’t now Pat as well as many in the organization, I found a soul sister in her approach and dedication towards the cause. I remember one year the conference was ending and I saw a bunch of suitcases sitting beside a couch in the lobby. It was Pat’s luggage. She was so busy making sure that she said “thank you” and “farewell” to every woman that she could find. She was so busy connecting to the women…..she forgot her luggage. Her dedication was incredible.

Rest in peace, Pat. You were a role model, a teacher, a cheerleader and a friend to everyone who you met. You probably never knew how many lives you affected and how many people looked up to you. You embodied the best of WFS and in that, made me want to be better. In both my sobriety and my life. I am in my 21 st year of sobriety and I owe much of that to you and the members of WFS. You, my dear, shall truly be missed. Our loss is certainly Heaven’s gain.
Renee F

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What I’ve Learned from Eight Months of (WE)covery

It has been 8 months since WFS started its diversity, equity, and inclusion (D.E.I.) group and wow have I learned a lot! I decided to start the group after some serious reflection following my How Intersectional is Your Feminism? blog post. I felt a real sense of urgency that day and I knew I didn’t want to lose that momentum. I have learned in my recovery that the best way to keep myself accountable is to get others involved, so I decided to start a group (#12).

Through much thought, consideration, and discussion, I decided to start a hybrid group that would be part support group, part organizational development group, with WFS Vice President Veena Iyer. We would introduce D.E.I.-related topics and women would have a chance to discuss them and reflect on how they affect us personally for most of the meeting (#8). Then in the last 10-15 minutes, we would “zoom out” and see how we could apply the topic to WFS as a whole, using the information to help us reach – and speak to the needs of – a more diverse group of women (#12). After our first meeting or two, we even had a name: (WE)covery: Exploring Equity.

I have learned that I have a lot to unlearn.

We have explored some pretty difficult topics, such as how being a “white ally” can be tricky and why there is such a disconnect about how people of color and white folks think about race. We have learned about white fragility and the pervasive roots of white supremacy in our culture. We’ve talked about how the drug war has unfairly targeted people of color and created a new basis for legal discrimination and how racial bias creates health disparities as early as birth. It seems that for every topic we cover, five more potential topics emerge!

I have learned that it is about me.

It has been comfortable – well, maybe not always comfortable – to learn about the historic foundations and systems of oppression in our culture. I could look objectively at these systems which predated me and were certainly outside of my immediate control, reassuring myself that I was raised not to see color and to treat everyone equally. I was, as author Layla Saad says, “one of the good ones.” How silly that I thought that I could grow up in a society with these pervasive systems of oppression and escape without any personal biases! But having developed implicit bias doesn’t make me “bad,” it makes me human.

(WE)covery has challenged me to go deeper, to really dig in and see how these things have affected my experience of the world. It has challenged me to step out of complacency and into action, identifying ways to do whatever I can to fight oppression, however small (#13). In going deeper and learning more, I’ve also discovered that while the disadvantages are always greater for the marginalized groups, being in dominant groups has downfalls, too. By embracing the fierce individualism that comes with whiteness, we also go through a dehumanization process and lose connection to our communities. My mom really (accidentally) hit the nail on the proverbial head when I was a kid and asked her about our heritage. Her response: “We’re just good ol’ American mutts, Adrienne.”

I have learned that this work is messy.

Really messy! Boy, have we had some blowouts, and I have definitely encountered some serious learning curve. This is such a challenging topic for so many, and the drop-in format brings an extra layer of complexity that we didn’t anticipate well. As with life, we have had to make course corrections, posting more introductory content in our (WE)covery forum and creating a separate Zoom link so people couldn’t accidentally stumble into the middle of a charged conversation. We’ve also had some really good process-related topics such as calling in vs calling out and how to have better political conversations which have helped us developed our discussion skills.

And of course, I am beyond grateful for our co-facilitator, Veena, who helps me debrief and supports me when I feel challenged by the AFGOs (Another Fabulous Growth Opportunity).

I have learned that it goes deeper than outreach.

Of course, the simplest answer to the question of how to make our program more diverse is to increase outreach, and to do more targeted outreach to underrepresented populations and include things like a variety of skin tones and personality types on marketing materials. But we’re gaining insight into the fact that it needs to go deeper than that. The phrase “diversity, equity, and inclusion” (D.E.I.) lends a lot of information here. Improving outreach can get you to diversity, which is really about getting a wide range of people showing up. That’s the first step. Then comes inclusion. When these diverse folks show up, they are greeted, welcomed, and included in the group. A great second step. And the deeper goal is the third step, equity, which is make sure that everyone is feeling fully seen, celebrated, and their needs are being addressed as fully as possible.

Now, our core program – the 13 Acceptance Statements, Levels of Recovery, and other WFS tools – appears that it should work equally well for everyone, and the consensus in the appears to be that this is true. And we have started to identify some way that our services and literature might be enhanced to address the needs of a more diverse group of women more fully. For example, it has come up a few times that addiction is even more heavily stigmatized in a lot of Asian cultures than it is in the US, especially for women. It is a complete cultural taboo to even mention it, much less seek support from friends and family. So in parts of our literature that talk about building a support network, we may want to simply acknowledge that this may be more difficult in such cultures and give additional strategies for those women. So the idea is not to change the core program itself, but to enhance the tools offered to meet a wider set of needs.

What the WFS organization is doing.

The WFS Board of Directors has made a strong commitment to ensuring that the New Life Program is accessible to and celebratory of all women. As most of you know, we have been engaged in developing a strategic plan since last summer, and the finalized plan is scheduled to be shared later this month. The board took careful steps to ensure that D.E.I. objectives are woven throughout the plan. They also put their money where their mouth is, dedicating a portion of this year’s budget to providing much-requested training to our volunteer leaders and group facilitators on this topic. The live, interactive Zoom training will be the first of its kind for WFS and will serve as a pilot for future empowerment opportunities.

Honoring our legacy.

I like to think that if Jean Kirkpatrick were still around today, she would be embracing this work to ensure that her life-saving New Life Program remains relevant, helpful, and empowering to all women in recovery from problematic substance use. I believe that the internal work I do to challenge my subconscious biases is a part of my spiritual growth in recovery (Statement 8). And I know that I am so proud to work for an organization that shows such a commitment to operate within its core values – to reach all women with competence and compassion!

Much Love,
Adrienne Miller
Women for Sobriety, Inc.


You are invite to join us!

(WE)covery: Exploring Equity

Edit 5/26/21: (WE)covery has a new, simplified schedule!
Join us every Monday at 6:30 pm US/Eastern
1st & 3rd Sunday of each month, 12:00-1:30 pm US/Eastern
2nd & 4th Thursdays, 3:00-4:30 pm US/Eastern
Must be logged in to WFS Online to join – registration is always free!

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2021 Conference Logo Challenge

It’s that time of year again!

The WFS Conference Management Team invites you to participate in this year’s Conference Logo Challenge! We are seeking an image that represents our slogan and can lay the foundation for our conference marketing and materials theme this year.

Our conference theme this year is:



Design Considerations:

  • Logo may include the actual words of the slogan, but it is not required.
  • Image should be compatible with overall WFS branding/style.
  • Logo must be professional quality and print-ready.
  • The WFS “W” logo may be included in the image.
  • Many women like to be able to use their tote bag and other conference loot after the event, but still wish to maintain their privacy as a woman in recovery. Please do not include the words recovery, sobriety, etc., in the image.

Technical Requirements:

  • Minimum 300 dpi.
  • Minimum 1080 pixels square.
  • Maximum file size 1 MB.
  • PNG files preferred. Vector file if available only for selected logo.
  • Any third-person artwork used, including images, clipart, fonts, etc., should be royalty-free and acceptable for commercial reuse without attribution; reasonable licensing fees (target <$100) may be paid by the organization if design is selected.

Some Royalty-Free Resources:

Submissions Must Include:

  • Full-color PNG of image.
  • Single-color PNG of image – this will be used for screen-printing projects and may not include gradations of the color; best format is black and white (not grayscale).
  • Link where WFS can confirm or obtain reuse rights and directly download any third-party files used (excluding most Microsoft fonts).


Submission Deadline:

Thursday, December 3, 2020

Email submissions to: [email protected]


Selection Process: Logos will be evaluated based on a number of factors, including consistency with design considerations and technical requirements, relation to other organizational initiatives, usability in print and other mediums, etc. Depending on quality, suitability, and number of submissions, two or more logos may be opened for a poll of WFS participants. Final selection of official logo rests with the Conference Management Team.

Save the Date!

The 2021 Virtual Conference event will be held online

June 11-13, 2021

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New WFS Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion Group

Our new diversity, equity, and inclusion group starts August 2nd! In order to offer a variety of times so that as many women as possible can attend, the schedule will be:

  • 1st & 3rd Sunday of each month, Noon – 1:00 pm US/Eastern
  • 2nd & 4th Thursday of each month, 3:00 – 4:00 pm US/Eastern

At our first meeting, we will review the results from the initial survey, pick out a name for the group (top contenders include “WEcovery” and “It’s a New D.E.I.”), collaborate on creating a group agreement and framework, and determine next steps. The group will have two major goals:

  • Provide a forum for us to gain support and insight as we deconstruct our personal biases, and
  • Create a space where we can reflect on how we can make WFS as an organization more inclusive, welcoming, and celebratory of all women in recovery.

This is an open group available to all WFS participants on a drop-in basis. The group will be facilitated by VKI and Adrienne.


First Meeting:

Sunday, August 2nd

Noon-1:00 pm US/Eastern

WFS Online Zoom Room


We hope to see you there!

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How to Talk About Current Events Without “Getting Political”

I want to talk about how we talk about tough stuff today. There are a lot of difficult things going on in the world right now, and I feel like we have reached an unprecedented level of polarization in America. Everything – even a major community health crisis like a global pandemic – is being heavily politicized, divided into “red against blue”.

So where does that leave us 4C women, who come from a variety of backgrounds, belief systems, and political affiliations? How do we support each other as we navigate our very real and often very deep feelings about current events and how they affect our New Lives? How can we capably and competently process the effect these topics are having on us whilst simultaneously maintaining caring and compassion for ourselves and our Sisters?

The easiest-to-manage answer is to just put a complete moratorium on anything “political” in our groups, which has been a practice in WFS in the past. However, given that it seems like nearly everything is a political issue these days, it doesn’t feel like that is a sustainable or helpful solution, and is likely to strip our meetings of the dynamism that our founder Dr. Jean Kirkpatrick intended for us. I would propose that the complicated challenges facing today’s women call for more nuanced solutions.

A Sister on our WFS Online community summarized the need for a conscientious approach well by saying,”The political IS personal because it influences our lives, our thoughts, our feelings, our anxiety levels, our enthusiasm and capacity to think positively about the future.”

So, here are some ideas on how we can effectively navigate these difficult topics whilst also gaining support for our New Lives, respecting the diversity of our Sisters, and maintaining a safe space for all:

  • We can share about our personal emotions without directly referencing which “side” of a political issue we stand on.
  • If that’s not possible, we can share about our personal emotions in response to a current event without trying to persuade others to agree with us.
  • When someone opens up to us about their emotions, we can keep our response focused on their personal experience, and leave our own opinions out of it.
  • If we are feeling emotionally activated by someone else’s share, we can take a break before responding. If we are really having a difficult time staying in compassion, we can simply choose to not say anything at all.
  • We can reach out to our personal support system (outside of WFS) for help processing our own emotions if needed, without trying to rally others to take our viewpoint or pitting Sisters against Sisters.
  • If a 4C Sister comes to us for individual support, we can support them emotionally without getting involved in their interpersonal conflict. We can take what they are saying with a grain of salt, knowing that their perspective and interpretation is just that – theirs – and that we don’t have to take their opinion on ourselves.
  • We can refrain from contacting someone individually in response to something shared in a group setting that we disagree with, especially if our contact is unwelcome.
  • We can respect others’ boundaries if they tell us they need a break from a topic, or from us.
  • We can respect the guidance of our community facilitators (Certified Chat Leaders, Forum Management Team, and Certified Moderators) by respecting their requests to redirect our sharing to focus on recovery, return to the topic at a meeting, or otherwise modify our behavior to be in line with WFS philosophy and guidelines.
  • We can assume good intentions, even when behavior is unskillful.
  • We can acknowledge and accept that most of us are here precisely because we don’t have the best skills at navigating challenging situations, that each 4C Sister is in a different place in her healing journey, and that we are all doing the best we can with the tools that we have available to us.

Talking about controversial current events, politics, and other types of difficult topics in WFS meetings might be new ground for some of us. But I believe that we are 4C, capable of keeping the focus on ourselves and our recoveries, without wading into persuasion and convincing. There will probably be missteps. Some of us will make mistakes. I might get caught up in the moment and spout an opinion or two – it has been known to happen. But I have a lot of faith in 4C women. I’ve seen us do some pretty amazing things!

With Much Love,
Adrienne Miller
WFS President/CEO

Do you have any additional ideas about ways to talk about the effect that current events are having on our New Lives without getting into debate or conflict? Please share them here!

You are also invited to the new inclusion workgroup of 4C women exploring how to dismantle our personal and organizational biases. Please participate in our brief survey to assist us with planning!

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How Intersectional is Your Feminism?

Feminism & Women For Sobriety
by Jean Kirkpatrick, PhD

In the early years, I was always startled when persons referred to WFS as part of the feminist movement and yet, I see quite clearly that it is.  Although I always knew that the values sought for through the Program are for women to be free from domination from others and to find themselves, I just never spoke of the WFS Program in this way.

But what is feminism?  Has there ever been a movement or a word so badly treated and misunderstood?

To me, feminism is the right of women to seek equality in jobs, in payment for those jobs, and to be treated equally under the law.  But it is so much more then that too.

To me, it means that we are to seek an equal status for ourselves and, in order to do that, we must find ourselves, define ourselves, and believe in ourselves.  And that’s what our program seeks to do.

Too long we have been treated unfairly through the overriding dominance of the male system, yet there was none other.  Too often I think we wanted to rebel but didn’t put anything in the place of the rebellion.

We cannot rise up against something unless we have something better to offer and I believe that can only happen when we change ourselves from dependent persons to independent persons, women strong in our beliefs, convictions, and commitments.

It is too easy to cry out about inequality without any substance underneath.  The WFS Program should provide a way to make us strong in beliefs that provide substance to our outcry.  Improving ourselves ultimately improves society.

One therapist, Miriam Greenspan, believes our thinking is at fault.  Women fail to recognize the ways that men depend upon women and we end up thinking of ourselves as ‘dependent,’ when, in reality, it is men who are dependent.  Women have been misled in our thinking.  Society continues to accommodate male independence and thwart women’s, and so we, as women, have impaired thinking.

Women for Sobriety stands for women’s strengths.  Both the program and the organization are dedicated to women finding inner strengths to create, and live the kind of lives we desire to live.


In the late 1980’s, WFS program founder Dr. Jean Kirkpatrick wrote the above article for the Sobering Thoughts newsletter. She also wrote frequently about women’s rights and the gender pay gap, and openly lamented about the Equal Rights Amendment not being ratified. Additionally, Jean testified twice before senate sub-committees advocating regarding the gender-specific needs of women with substance use disorders. Indeed, Jean was not afraid of “getting political” when it mattered – when it was relevant to the cause of empowering women so that they could come into their own and take control of their lives and their addictions.

As feminist theory has evolved, it has broadened to recognize the concept of intersectionality. This is the idea that in addition to the challenges faced by all women in our culture by virtue of their gender, some women face additional systemic and social barriers that compound marginalization and pushes them further to the fringes. These systemic and social barriers can range from the more invisible challenges such as education level, class, socioeconomic status, and sexuality, to more visible differences such as physical disability and non-white skin tone.

It’s not an “I-have-it-worse-than-you” competition. It’s about acknowledging and recognizing imbalances so that we can correct them.

It has taken me a long time to de-stigmatize my own feelings about having prejudices toward people with different skin tones. I was raised to believe that only bad or evil people are “racist”, and I initially felt really defensive when I started to look at my own subconscious prejudices. “But I’m a good person!” was my underlying thought. It took me a long time and a lot of work to accept that my deeply ingrained biases didn’t make me a bad person — they are simply an inevitable result of growing up in a society that was built on a racialized system. We have come a long way, yes, but there is still a very long way to go.

It’s a lot like recovery. I had to come out of denial so that I could grow.

I recognize my privilege as a white woman. Even though I have experienced a number of other sources of marginalization, my skin color is not one of them. I recognize that I sometimes jump too quickly to sharing my own, unrelated challenges when my friends of color share their stories of racial discrimination. I recognize that I am quick to say that I advocate against racism while in actuality I take very little concrete action to change the system that perpetuates it. I recognize that even though this topic is important to me and highly relevant to WFS (our program surveys show that a disproportionate number of our participants – over 90% – are white), my own insecurities and privilege kept me from addressing this critical topic sooner.

This is also a lot like recovery. It’s not a single event to unlearn a lifetime of conditioning, it is an ongoing process.

Today, I am following Jean’s example and taking a risk. I am “getting political” about something that matters to me, and something that I believe should matter to every single woman that walks through the proverbial WFS door. I am scared to be “going there” in my official capacity as WFS President/CEO. I feel really vulnerable sharing these things in this public way, and as a public figure in this organization. Yet I know that my discomfort does not come close to comparing to the discomfort of my 4C Sisters of color. And I know that as a woman in a leadership position, my conscience would not be clear if I did not respond in some way to the issues that are currently being raised.

Today, I accept the responsibility of proactively learning from the resources available to me.

So here I am, asking my 4C Sisters:

  • What are we, the white women of WFS, willing to do to make sure that we fulfill the mission of WFS – to help all women find their individual path to recovery?
  • How can we effectively reach out to women of color and help them feel welcomed and included in our groups?
  • How can we hold each other accountable for creating a community that not only welcomes, but actively celebrates, every woman who finds our New Life Program?
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