Posted on 3 Comments

Announcing the 2022 Teddy Bear Challenge!

In 2011, a loved member and chat leader, TeddyBear started the Teddy Bear Challenge. In 2021, the Teddy Bear Challenge raised $77,274!

  • 155 financial donations, including 9 of $1,000 or more
  • $50,000 from our anonymous WFS angel
  • The sale on eBay of 13 Statement bracelets were also contributed

The main purpose of the Teddy Bear Challenge is the fundraising.  However, to make it even more fun and offer women an opportunity to put Statement #10 into action, “All love given returns” … teddy bears and bunnies are stuffed & accessorized and then offered as prizes in a drawing. It is our belief that the dolls will deliver hugs and love to whomever receives them.  To date, 100 dolls have been given away in this effort, with love given to the doll and returned to all.

Financial donors are entered into this drawing, unless they opt out.  eBay buyers can request to be entered by using the electronic form.  However, a financial donation or purchase is not required to enter.  See below for the rules the drawing.

Would you or your group like to join in the fun?

The Teddy Bear Challenge needs volunteers or groups to stuff the dolls, raise awareness in the WFS community and organize/perform supporting activity for the event.  Contact [email protected] if you are interested.

Donate to the TBC online womenforsobriety.org/donatetbc
or download this form to mail in your donation.

The funds are much needed to support the operations and programs offered by Women For Sobriety, Inc.   WFS is a 501(c) (3) non-profit Corporation.

About the Drawing

Entry to the drawing closes on June 14, 2022.  Winners will be announced on June 20, 2022.  The winners will be emailed notification and asked to complete an online form to provide a shipping address.  Note, the stuffed doll can be sent to another person or organization, within your own country, if you confirm that they will accept it … but gift wrapping is unavailable.

Teddy Bear Drawing Rules

No donation necessary to win.  To enter without making a donation, complete the form at womenforsobriety.org/entertbc  Minimum 18 years of age.  One entry per person.  Employees, directors and officers of WFS and their immediate family members (parent, child, sibling and spouse of each) and those living in the same households of each (whether related or not) are not eligible.  Odds of winning will depend on number of entries.  To be eligible for the drawing, entries must have been received by June 14th, 2022, online or postal mail to PO BOX 618, Quakertown, PA, 18951, USA.

Posted on Leave a comment

Monday Thoughts 1.31.22

life is great

Monday Thoughts

“Don’t plan it all. Let life surprise you a little.”  ~~Julia Alverez

“If one has no sense of humor, one is in trouble.”  ~~Betty White

“I’m all about spontaneity.  I think it makes for greatness.”  ~~Camille Kostek


#6 Life can be ordinary or it can be great.

Greatness is mine by a conscious effort.


Laughter and spontaneity oftentimes go hand and hand. Take a moment to just reflect back on the last time you really busted out laughing; maybe you were laughing so hard you had tears running down your face or even had to pause to catch your breath.  You couldn’t script that moment any more than you could stop your giggling.  In sobriety and recovery, it is essential to be able to laugh and to embrace the moment.

Statement #6 in action encourages presence and that includes laughter.  Sobriety is not the end of joyful moments, rather it is the beginning of a New Life which includes laughter, giggles, chortles, and cackles.And where there is laughter, there is a sense of spontaneity that can bring out the child in each of us.

This week, look for and find ways to open yourself up to laughter.  Sometimes it can feel like there is so much chaos and heaviness going on in the world right now yet allowing laughter to permeate your senses can alleviate some of that weight.  This was especially helpful for me in early sobriety; watching comedies each week, if not daily allowed me to connect to my emotions and feelings.  It felt like a jump start into recovery.  Make it your mission this week to let go of rigidity, welcome laughter and make every day special!

Hugzzz

Karen

Dear 4C Women,

I had major technical issues on Wednesday night.  My smoke alarm went on for 20 minutes until I finally figured out which unit was causing the ear shattering problem and was also hurting my dog’s ears, my DIRECTV sent a message that my Genie hard drive was broken and needed to be replaced and then my landline stopped working as it was decided to turn off that breaker to see if it would stop the smoke alarm from its screeching sound.  I was not laughing.  However, I was fortunate to have the best neighbors who were there to help me.  When I reflect on that night, it would have made a great comedy of errors.  It was not an ordinary night yet it was one filled with gratitude for helpful, caring neighbors.  Shockingly, a new hard drive was delivered the next morning and my neighbor installed it with ease that afternoon.  Poor guy even tried to teach me a few tips on how to program the remote.  I have a daily calendar and the quote for that Wednesday was: Today’s Forecast: 100% FANTASTIC!  Now that made me laugh.  I needed that as I collapsed on the sofa. 

I have had women share that they felt flat when they became sober.  I feel Jean understood this feeling and created Statement #6 to give us hope and direction to experience moments of our New Life as joyful, becoming spontaneous in that joy and having awareness of its impact on our daily lives.  For me, it does not mean denying or ignoring the tough times.  It means acknowledging the great moments when they happen and relish them as treasures to be recalled when we have that flat feeling.  I actually began enjoying celebrations as a sober woman.  I was in the moment and it was one of the greatest gifts of sobriety.  I had fun, I laughed, I remembered the moments. 

Here’s what I love about spontaneity.  The word itself says it’s not planned which in the past I found myself thinking I had to plan fun.  It wasn’t a moment that happened, it was a detailed plan such as a vacation or event that was going to be fun and that’s that!  If my plan didn’t turn out to be fun, I started all that negative self-talk that I wasn’t deserving of fun.  I really screwed up and I’ll never have fun ever again in my life.  The all or nothing thinking.  Nancy Cross once wrote to focus on the end result, not the how, which is how I was living my life.  Well, as I began to practice Statement #6, I found myself laughing at small things like the kid next door who came over one Christmas and started turning on all my musical snowmen of which there are many and laughing so hard.  He also had an iPad that he selected a Michael Jackson song to play and started singing along and dancing around the room.   He showed me exactly what spontaneous meant.  I found myself laughing more often because I was learning to be in the moment.  So, think about the last time you spontaneously laughed, what actions can you take to bond yourself to living life in the now and what is “your” definition of greatness in sobriety/recovery.  I hope you will consider Karen’s suggestions and find yourself in the light of unexpected joyful laughter this week and keep practicing it. 

Bonded in learning to be in the moment and experiencing authentic joy, Dee


Dear 4C Women,
I had major technical issues on Wednesday night.  My smoke alarm went on for 20 minutes until I finally figured out which unit was causing the ear shattering problem and was also hurting my dog’s ears, my DIRECTV sent a message that my Genie hard drive was broken and needed to be replaced and then my landline stopped working and it was decided to turn off that breaker to see if it would stop the smoke alarm from its screeching sound.  I was not laughing.  However, I was fortunate to have the best neighbors who were there to help me.  When I reflect on that night, it made a great comedy of errors.  It was not an ordinary night, yet it was one filled with gratitude for helpful, caring neighbors.  Shockingly, a new hard drive was delivered the next morning and my neighbor installed it with ease that afternoon.  Poor guy even tried to teach me a few tips on how to program the remote.

I have a daily calendar and the quote for that Wednesday was: Today’s Forecast: 100% FANTASTIC!  Now that made me laugh.  I needed that as I collapsed on the sofa. 

I have had women share that they felt flat when they became sober.  I feel Jean understood this feeling and created Statement #6 to give us hope and direction to experience moments of our New Life as joyful, becoming spontaneous in that joy, and having awareness of its impact on our daily lives.  For me, it does not mean denying or ignoring the tough times.  It means acknowledging the great moments when they happen and relishing them as treasures to be recalled when we have that flat feeling.  I actually began enjoying celebrations as a sober woman.  I was in the moment and it was one of the greatest gifts of sobriety.  I had fun, I laughed, I remembered the moments. 

Here’s what I love about spontaneity.  The word itself says it’s not planned which in the past I found myself thinking I had to plan fun.  It wasn’t a moment that happened, it was a detailed plan such as a vacation or event that was going to be fun and that’s that!  If my plan didn’t turn out to be fun, I started all that negative self-talk that I wasn’t deserving of fun.  I really screwed up and I’ll never have fun ever again in my life.  The all-or-nothing thinking.  Nancy Cross once wrote that we should focus on the end result, not the how, which is how I was living my life.  Well, as I began to practice Statement #6, I found myself laughing at small things like the kid next door who came over one Christmas and started turning on all my musical snowmen of which there are many, and laughing so hard.  He also had an iPad that he selected a Michael Jackson song to play and started singing along and dancing around the room.   He showed me exactly what spontaneous meant.  I found myself laughing more often because I was learning to be in the moment.

So, think about the last time you spontaneously laughed, what actions can you take to bond yourself to living life in the now, and what is “your” definition of greatness in sobriety/recovery.  I hope you will consider Karen’s suggestions and find yourself in the light of unexpected joyful laughter this week and keep practicing it. 

Bonded in learning to be in the moment and experiencing authentic joy, Dee


Posted on Leave a comment

Monday Thoughts 1.24.22

new podcast episode new faces of recovery

“To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.”   ~~Ralph Waldo Emerson

“You wouldn’t worry so much about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.”  ~~Eleanor Roosevelt

“Don’t waste your energy trying to change opinions…do your thing, and don’t care if they like it.” ~~Tina Fey


#5 I am what I think.

I am a capable, competent, caring, compassionate woman.


“Will people still like me? Will I fit in? Will I be treated differently?”  These are just some of the questions that burned in my mind walking into this new sober life.  Without a clue as to what was in store, sobriety and recovery became a healthy way of life thanks to the WFS Statements and the New Life Program.

Statement #5 is the foundation that all the other Statements build on.  From those five simple words comes a life of fullness, balance, and authenticity.  In the past, it was simple for me to try to “be” someone else.  I was forever comparing and complaining, wondering how to be like them.  I looked to everyone else for input into my life yet the cost was high…I lost myself.  This Statement doesn’t read I am what someone else thinks…. It states triumphantly I am what * I* think!

In our WFS Program booklet, it states, “The way we experience our life is a result of our thoughts.  With our mind, we shape our day.” Each morning I begin the day reading the Statements.  It sets the tone for the day and helps keep my mind focused.  With the endless supply of distractions in this world, this one act opens the door to keeping an eye on my thoughts. The awareness helps to identify patterns and connect with what matters to me.  After all, I am a capable, competent, caring, compassionate woman!

Hugzzz

Karen


Dear 4C Women,

My addiction enhanced my lost feeling and it took a while for me to realize that in order to practice Statement #5, I had to take responsibility for finding the authentic me and be my own cheerleader.  Part of that was setting boundaries with my own thoughts.  Yes, my negative thoughts about who I was did not support the woman I yearned for, the woman I lost and left behind in my addiction.

I know we talk about setting boundaries for others in order to protect ourselves from toxic relationships.   I finally understood that my negative thinking about myself was hindering any possibility of becoming the 4C woman I wanted to be.  I set boundaries on my negative description of myself.  The moment I started negative self-talk, I stopped and replaced it with positive self-talk.  Even if it was one word, i.e., stupid, I would immediately change it to smart.  I am smart.  I am wise.  I am becoming a 4C woman.  It is amazing how after becoming sober, the negative thoughts were still there, an automatic response.  It took consistency, commitment, and courage to practice Statement #5 and know that in changing my thoughts, I was on my way to believing I was and now am a 4C woman.  One way to help identify the positive qualities you possess is to think about the inside gifts you have that you share with others, with the world.  Nancy Cross once wrote in a message with a great question.  “What Makes Me Unique?”  We all have gifts, uniqueness, positive qualities that we need to acknowledge whenever the inner critic shows up trying to put the past into the present with old, destructive messages.  We learn and grow each day on this amazing and challenging journey.  It is what Jean learned about herself and then taught us – to release the past, build ourselves up with empowering, loving words, to keep moving forward with compassion for ourselves.

My favorite 5 questions, which includes courage, for Statement #5:

I am capable of….

I am competent in…

I am caring about….

I am compassionate about…

I express courage by…

Bonded in believing and living our lives as 4C women, Dee


Listen to an episode of The Think Courageously Podcast

Featuring Adrienne Miller from WFS

Episode Here

new podcast episode new faces of recovery

Posted on Leave a comment

Monday Thoughts 1.17.22

hand holding seedling

Monday Thoughts

“Walls turned sideways are bridges.”  ~~Angela Davis

“Fear builds its phantoms which are more fearsome than reality itself.”  ~~Jawaharlal Nehru

“Success is sometimes the outcome of a whole string of failures.”  ~~Vincent Van Gogh


#4 Problems bother me only to the degree I permit.

I now better understand my problems.

I do not permit problems to overwhelm me.


 Sober life tends to move through different stages much like the seasons. From the increasing daylight of spring and new life into summer days full of energy and brightness. Followed by fall, unfurling itself to where we are right now, wrapped up in a slower pace of hibernation and stillness, we can be reminded of how Statement #4 in action goes through the very same process.

Active addiction makes it impossible to reap a harvest of growth and blossoming relationships.  It can remove any sense of connection while digging a deep hole of loneliness.  Imbalance sets in like overgrown weeds and chokes off new seedlings.  Life and love cannot flourish without nourishment.

Sobriety and Statement #4 in action create a garden full of hope, resilience, and growth. Beautiful tall blooms of optimism, opportunity, and overcoming stand tall while layers of peace, love, and patience fill in underneath.  Covering the ground level, a vast curtain of contentment and connection fills in any bare spots, bringing a sense of balance and ease into view.  It is a garden of you, growing and evolving with the changing seasons.  What will you plant today for your future harvest?

Hugzzz

Karen


Dear 4C Women,

I love every word of Karen’s message.  I could visualize the seasons, the garden and finally, the hope experienced in recovery.  My drinking mostly hurt the relationship I had with myself.  I made unhealthy choices and everything – I mean everything – was a problem.  I could not discern the difference between a problem and a genuine concern that needed my attention. I lacked problem-solving skills and decision-making abilities.  Because I saw everything as a problem, I was constantly overwhelmed.  Learning to understand authentic concerns was such a gift in teaching me those skills of problem-solving that drinking took away.

As I began to think clearly, I also learned to seek input, to be vulnerable, and yet know that the final decision was mine to make.  Mistakes were made yet learning was taking place.  I realized how much time I wasted on non-issues and how much more energy and time I had to tackle the real concerns facing me.  I also realized that I was using everyday problems to stop me from facing the important decisions to be made.  I was fearful of making more mistakes.  A big lesson for me was that mistakes were just that – a learning curve for the next time and that success was possible.  In fact, I probably learned a lot more by being open, willing, and vulnerable, to accept mistakes and keep moving forward.

Jean Kirkpatrick had such a clear understanding of women’s roles when she created this program back in 1975.  She understood the societal expectations of women and how that created overwhelming pressure for women who sought relief by drinking or using substances.  There was a double standard and not much support but lots of judgment.  We were expected to be the best in everything, take care of all relationships, put others before ourselves and not complain.  That certainly created a lot of overwhelming pressure.  Jean knew this and it guided her to write this empowering WFS program.  Of course, pressures still exist as women’s roles expanded.  Fortunately, through WFS, I have seen women learn to value themselves, speak their voice, practice self-care, learn coping skills that include problem-solving and decision making.  The most important thing is that there is support given and received.  We share our journey, women strong, compassionate and caring.

Bonded in planting our future harvest of hope, resilience, and supporting each other along the way, Dee


CALL FOR PRESENTATIONS

Do you have a particular interest or expertise that you can share with the WFS community during our 2022 Annual Conference?

WFS is planning for our in-person conference and seeking workshop presenters for the event.  The conference theme of “Bloom” opens up a very wide range of potential workshop topics related to recovery and emotional and spiritual growth.

Please consider giving back to WFS by designing and presenting a workshop. We have so many talented and knowledgeable women in our community that the possibilities are endless for topics and content.

Proposals for workshop topics are due January 31st, 2022.

https://womenforsobriety.org/community/#


Love our new logo?

Show your WFS pride with our new merch!

SHOP NOW!

Posted on Leave a comment

Monday Thoughts 1.10.22

“There is an amazing power getting to know your inner self and learning how to use it and not fight with the world.  If you know what makes you happy, your personality, interests, and capabilities, just use them, and everything else flows beautifully.”  ~~Juhi Chawla

“I wanted a perfect ending.  Now I’ve learned, the hard way, that some poems don’t rhyme, and some stories don’t have a clear beginning, middle, and end.  Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment, and making the best of it, without knowing what’s going to happen next.  Delicious Ambiguity.”  ~~Gilda Radner

“So many people waste time waiting for good things to happen to them.  But sometimes we need to make good things happen.  And when we finally start doing that, we often see there were good things in our lives all along.”  ~~Caroline George


#3 Happiness is a habit I am developing.

Happiness is created, not waited for.


“What makes your insides smile?”

Another 4C woman asked that question on the WFS Online Forum some years ago and it struck me deeply.  First off, I could not recall that kind of joy or happiness before sobriety and recovery. Alcohol had altered my thoughts and mind to the point that everything felt like a struggle.  I fought against seemingly everything. Statement #3 immediately became a welcome new concept.

Our founder, Jean Kirkpatrick, Ph.D. understood this need and created Statement #3.  In fact, Jean knew this so well that she wrote in our WFS Program booklet “For many years, I was convinced that some people were just naturally happy and others were not.  And most of the time, I was not happy.  I was too deep into my feeling sorry for myself, waiting for the time when everything in my life would miraculously change, and then instant happiness would follow.”

Happiness is not instant like oatmeal or grits, but it can be created.  When I was growing up, the sound of racecars at a local track rumbled through my bedroom window while drifting off to sleep.  My brother even raced there for a time.  Yet when I became an adult, I waited for race tickets to magically appear.  They never did. As my interests continue grow and evolve, I know that thanks to sobriety and Statement #3 in action, I have the greatest ticket there is …. a ticket to my beautiful 4C life!

Hugzzz
Karen


Dear 4C Women,

My first thought was how much can be purchased online these days, how easy and convenient to get practically anything we desire delivered right to our front door.  Yet, as Karen describes, we have the ability to obtain, free of charge, no shipping costs, the ticket to creating our own happiness.  The big difference is that we have to know what to include in that ticket to happiness.

It can start with the question Karen presented, “What makes your insides smile?”  I must admit that what makes my insides smile, in addition to facilitating WFS meetings and writing the Monday Thoughts, is connecting with family and friends in person up North and the hope of eventually seeing my son who moved to CA over 2 years ago.  That is not possible for me right now so I have to dig deeper to create that personal ticket to happiness in the present.  I believe the pandemic has left many of us questioning how to create happiness in uncertain times.  Yet, uncertain times have been around for centuries and I’m sure our ancestors had to cope with this very issue of creating happiness in difficult times.

I researched on the internet for a list of things to make you happy.  As I was searching through a myriad of lists, I came across one that had answers from children.  It was so authentic, some material things that kids love and others were deeply caring feelings from the heart.  So, I was thinking that’s what I need to do; create a list of gratitude for what I have, appreciating those heartfelt and material things.  I love my DVR because I can watch my shows whenever I want.  Believe it or not, years ago I would stay home to watch a favorite show rather than attend an event.  I’m grateful for Zoom and Facebook where I can access people I love, people I have lost contact with.  My brother-in-law passed away in April and I was able to virtually attend his funeral in PA through the internet.  I wish I could have been there yet what a gift to be a part of it virtually.  I wrote a memory letter that was read, watched as my nephew, who is a pastor and conducted the service, walk over to my sister/his mom and asked her if she wanted to dance to one of my brother-in-law’s favorite songs.  My sister has Parkinson’s so just seeing that smile on her face as my nephew helped her stand and dance in place is a beautiful memory I will treasure always.

I am grateful for electricity and that became so apparent when we experienced power failure during the 2011 tornadoes.  I can’t tell you how many times during the week that I flipped on light switches, the microwave, and tv.  I’m also grateful for modern medicine, researchers, and scientists that continue to search for answers to help heal or at least improve people’s health. Most of all, I am grateful for WFS and how it changed my life and has given me the opportunity to share it with so many women over the 33 years I’ve been a part of it.  I have support, I’ve given support and the reward is, as they say, “priceless.”

I encourage you to create your list of gratefulness and perhaps as you do so, you’ll uncover what authentically creates happiness in your life, both materially and in the heart.  Hopefully, this list will also help you to include more of what brings you joy into your everyday life or add it back in.

Bonded in developing happiness, joy, and gratefulness, Dee


CALL FOR PRESENTATIONS

Do you have a particular interest or expertise that you can share with the WFS community during our 2022 Annual Conference?

WFS is planning for our in-person conference and seeking workshop presenters for the event.  The conference theme of “Bloom” opens up a very wide range of potential workshop topics related to recovery and emotional and spiritual growth.

Please consider giving back to WFS by designing and presenting a workshop. We have so many talented and knowledgeable women in our community that the possibilities are endless for topics and content.

Proposals for workshop topics are due January 31st, 2022.

https://womenforsobriety.org/community/#

Posted on Leave a comment

Conference 2022 – CALL FOR PRESENTATIONS

Do you have a particular interest or expertise that you can share with the WFS community during our 2022 Annual Conference?

WFS is planning for our in person conference and seeking workshop presenters for the event.  The conference theme of “Bloom” opens up a very wide range of potential workshop topics related to recovery and emotional and spiritual growth.

Please consider giving back to WFS by designing and presenting a workshop. We have so many talented and knowledgeable women in our community that the possibilities are endless for topic and content.

Proposals for workshop topics are due January 31st, 2022.

Learn more about presenting here.

Posted on Leave a comment

Monday Thoughts 1.3.2022

women for sobriety decorative image woman stretching

Monday Thoughts

Negative thinking is contagious.  Do your best not to dwell on negativity, it will consume you and prevent you from becoming your best self.”  ~~Germany Kent

“Believing in negative thoughts is the single greatest obstruction to success.”  ~~Charles F. Glassman

“Don’t ever stop believing in your own transformation.  It is still happening even on days you may not realize it or feel like it.”  ~~Lalah Delia


#2 Negative thoughts destroy only myself.

My first conscious sober act is to reduce negativity in my life.


What? Me? Negative? Uh, no way. Never.  These are some words that were frequently a part of my vocabulary before New Life.  Denial kept me locked in active addiction for years, yet moving into sobriety was the beginning of CHANGE, an acronym for Choose Having A New Growth Experience.

Sobriety and Statement #2 in action create a sense of balance and can offer ease and contentment.  Starting with awareness of thoughts, which can feel overwhelming at first, opens the door to identifying, understanding and lastly, managing thoughts.

In our WFS Program booklet it states “Negative thoughts can destroy us in many ways.  An important aspect of negative thoughts for us is that such thoughts often precede using or drinking.  A state of “what’s the use?” or “who cares?” can initiate an attempt to escape from reality.”

Here are some examples of negative thinking along with opportunities to change them:

1.      All or nothing, or black/white thinking:

“I will never be able to _______.”  Instead, “I may or may not achieve ______ the first time I try, but I will do my best and can learn along the way.”  What is in the gray area in between?  Will this line of thinking help or hurt me?  Or take me further towards or further away from sobriety?

2.      Catastrophizing:

“It will be a disaster” or “It will never work.” Instead, “I am open to experiencing what is in front of me.”  Or “I have everything I need within me to succeed or move through this.”  Challenge these thoughts and embrace growth.

3.      Shoulding or blaming:

“They/he/she/I should do/don’t/be__________”.  Instead, let go of judgments or blame and focus on compassion “They/he/she/I am trying to understand and they/he/she/I am not their/my behaviors and/or embrace that you do not have all the answers.

4.      I’m not good enough:

“I don’t measure up.” Instead, name your strengths.  No one but you has your set of insights and understanding.  You are an important part of the human experience and you are worthy of receiving what you want in life.  You are capable, competent, caring and compassionate.

Hugzzz

Karen


Dear 4C Women,

Negative thoughts are a natural thought process.  It is how we hold onto them, how they cloud our thinking/decision making and hinder our ability to learn not only how to stop them from becoming harmful but also ways to change our thinking process.  It is what I appreciate about WFS.  We are given tools to help us achieve a positive attitude when it seems impossible.  I mention this often because I feel so strongly about it and that is how critical it is to acknowledge our feelings.  How can we learn to change our thoughts, our actions, if we don’t acknowledge authentic feelings?  If I am angry, disappointed, sad or a myriad of other feelings, how can I gain insight as to why if I pretend they don’t exist?

I have been struggling with anger and disappointment over a family issue and it’s taking a lot of digging deep to figure out why I am so affected and what is within my control to change it.  What I’ve discovered is the only control I have is how I approach it after I uncover the deepest feeling.  That feeling is fear.  It would be so much easier if it were my personal issue because I have control over my response, my willingness to be proactive and do what I feel needs to be done.  Thankfully, even though I am filled with fear, I have learned to speak my voice, to be heard.  And therein is the most challenging issue of all – to be heard when I speak my truth, to be understood. Yet I won’t let that possibility of being dismissed or ignored stop me.  My words may not be received as I hoped yet if I say nothing, then nothing changes, no seed is planted for a better communication and a path towards healing.   As I look at Karen’s examples, I realize I have experienced all of the negative thoughts and gratefully, have been able to put into action many of the empowering suggestions she made.

This is from the Inner Critic (known also as our inner dialog, scripts or tapes) workshop Nina and I presented at a WFS conference:

Watch your thoughts; they become words.

Watch your words; they become actions.

Watch your actions; they become habits.

Watch your habits; they become character.

Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

Patrick Overton

To stop the inner critic, the negative thoughts, start creating an awareness when the inner critic begins its attack and change the message asap!  You can name your inner critic as I have and when it appears, I look over my shoulder and flick it off with a few strong words.  I have the ability to reduce its impact but only if I am aware of its presence.  Old messages, old tapes are a big clue that this is no longer your truth in the present.

This is from the Inner Critic (known also as our inner dialog, scripts or tapes) workshop Nina and I presented at a WFS conference:

Watch your thoughts; they become words.

Watch your words; they become actions.

Watch your actions; they become habits.

Watch your habits; they become character.

Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

Patrick Overton

To stop the inner critic, the negative thoughts, start creating an awareness when the inner critic begins its attack and change the message asap!  You can name your inner critic as I have and when it appears, I look over my shoulder and flick it off with a few strong words.  I have the ability to reduce its impact but only if I am aware of its presence.  Old messages, old tapes are a big clue that this is no longer your truth in the present.


2022 Women for Sobriety Conference – Call for Presentations